I am sure 9 out of 10 of you who clicked this link are wishing to read some sad emotional story about a girl who ‘asked for it’ and was brutally assaulted and violated by a bunch of savages because her skirt was a little above her knees. So that we can all feel bad for a second and then blame the girl in our minds for not ‘dressing well’ instead of the mentally derailed dogs for seeking pleasure in someone screaming and scratching in pain.
Yes, we have all been raped, maybe not physically. We have been raped over and over again anytime we make a rape joke. Anytime we find amusing, the fact that someone was forcefully stripped of his or her dignity.
We now live in a society where songs like Robin Thicke’s ‘we want it’ receive awards and top billboard charts and an artiste is not done singing until he makes a degrading comment about women and their bodies.
We live in a world were women are now spoils of war and celebrities who commit atrocities such as domestic and sexual violence against women are given a pat on the hand and rewarded Oscars.
We have all been raped, every single time we tweet, retweet, sub, like or comment on ‘nudes leak’ of women. Yet I wonder why no one ever leaks nudes of men.
Where literary fantasies have now become innocent girls, made to do things beyond their imagination, and the guy is forgiven because he has a ‘broken past’. Everyone has a broken past; it doesn’t give you the right to ignore the consent of others.
I was appalled when a classmate was accused of rape and he said”This is the hottest gist I’ve heard of myself”. I am pretty sure that if he was accused of theft he would have found that much more insulting. We live in this shallow degraded world where a woman has more chances of being raped than of earning a college degree.
Personally, I hate the sentence “I was raped”. It excludes the fact that it was committed by somebody. Like “the book was misplaced”, it doesn’t indicate the fact that someone is responsible for the act. “Someone raped me”... That is a sentence you hardly hear in the news, the misogyny and patriarchy have blindly covered even those who claim to be heralds of the truth.
I once saw a poster that said, “Rape!, now that I have got your attention, enjoy the best cuisines from XYX Hotels”. It was disgusting!. There are numerous advertising strategies to employ but for a society like ours to be extremely comfortable with such billboards on our streets, We then have all been raped.
There are a million topics to use to get people’s attention; sports, religion, politics, entertainment even food itself. But a bunch of college-certificate-wielding PR experts with NBA’s and Ph.Ds. found it thoughtful that the only way to gain the attention of people is to use the word rape.
Let me explain in all intensity, what rape is as defined by feminist Author, Roxane Gay in her book, Bad Feminist.
“...rape is a difficult experience to survive physically and emotionally, there is the exposure to unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, vaginal and anal tearing, fistulae and vaginal scar tissue. The reproductive system is often irreparably damaged. Victims of rape have a higher chance of miscarrying a pregnancy. Psychologically, there are many effects, including PTSD, anxiety, fear, coping with the social stigma and coping with shame and on and on. The aftermath can be far-reaching and more devastating than the rape itself”
If you are sexualizing 15 year old girls and getting turned on by the length of sleeves, you are the problem.
If you judge a woman by her appearance, it doesn’t define her; It defines the sick bastard you might be.
If you make a rule where boys are not disturbed for wearing brief length shorts out but girls are harassed for wearing free flowing gowns, you give an impression that boys are absolutely not responsible for the irrational decisions they make. Your dress code is SEXIST and promotes rape culture.
If you firmly believe that the value of a woman is reduced by the touch of your hands, you are the problem.
My body isn’t a temple. It is a castle with a moat and crocodiles and a dragon that will set you on fire if you touch me.
I am not written in braille, you do not have to touch me to know me.
Rape is much more serious than it would always seem and once we keep quiet about this cankerworm eating our society, we would find ourselves accepting such horrendous violations as a ‘rite of passage’.
“Qui tacet consentire videtur” – Silence gives consent.
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Iweanya Victor is an Entrepreneur and a Blogger
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