Saturday 29 June 2013 0 comments


I wept.
I wept.
And I wept again.
I was never going to forgive myself and if I did, it was going to be the hardest thing ever. Diana died without me conveying my feelings. Diana died without me apologizing for everything that went wrong. Diana died without becoming my friend. I was extremely hurt.
That night I sat on my bed pondering on all that had happened as tears ran down my face gently. “Diana was gone” were the words that kept ringing in my head. Not long after, I was about to drift into a painful sleep when I heard some-one crying with excruciating pain from the back of my window. I got down from my bed, picked up my torch-light and walked up to where the sound was coming from.

After putting on my torch to discover who it was, I was shocked at what I saw. Don’t be scared, it wasn’t the ghost of Diana. It was Emeka, he cried even louder when he saw me. His eyes were red, his face was swollen and he had a white piece of paper in his hands. Before I could even say anything, he spoke gently but in tears “I’m sorry Bryan, I’m sorry for everything I did to Diana, I’m sorry for lying to you about her,”
“Lie! What are you talking about” I responded in grief and shock. He then began to explain how he had asked Diana out before they came into Triumphant University. However, she simply refused to go out with him even though she admitted that she liked him and that was why he was mean to her. He concluded by saying that now he knew why she didn’t agree, it was because she had known that she was going to leave soon and didn’t want to hurt his feelings.
After he was done, he handed over the piece of paper he held in his hands to me. It was a letter he wrote to Diana after her death.
Dear Diana,
I’m sorry I never took time to understand what you were going through before you died. I’m sorry I made your life miserable despite the fact that it was short. I’m sorry I never gave you a chance to be happy and ruined every sign of happiness that I could tamper with.

Dear Diana, please forgive me. 

Written By: Olugbeje Temitope


This just has a Spiritual aura.......

Photograph By: Lexash Photography
Wednesday 26 June 2013 0 comments


This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all OK and she shouldn't worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumour that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumour to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and at home, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative humans. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, and your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well-deserved vindication is coming.

Saturday 22 June 2013 0 comments

Dear Diana. (Episode 4)

“What did she do to you?” I screamed at Emeka as soon as I saw him. I was furious and frustrated. He simply laughed without any tangible response. At that moment, I became angrier as I shook him gently “Oh boy, talk now”
“I just hate her” he finally voiced out with anger lacing his response. Tosin and Charles simply stared at us without wanting to involve themselves in our case.
“How can you just hate somebody” I responded.
“She’s a bitch, a bitch for what she did to me” Emeka shouted angrily.
“Because of something that happened how many years ago, get over it and grow up” I hissed.
With those words, Emeka walked out on me.

Exams came and left rapidly like it was in a hurry and no-one could stop it. Through it all, I searched for Diana but she was no-where to be found. At a point, I began to ask around but nobody seemed to know about her where-abouts. I knew something was wrong but I just couldn’t place my finger on it.
Resumption for the next semester was definitely not the same without her. Apparently, she had the best result in the class for last semester. Classes were a bore and there was nobody to answer the difficult questions in class or bail me out of a lecturer’s palava (troublesome question).
“Diana, where are you?” I whispered gently in my heart. My train on thoughts were stopped by some girls talking and crying in a corner. Very soon, they began to attract people. Curious, I walked towards them to find out about what had happened.

I didn’t even have to get to where they were before I heard whispers of “Diana Okwudili died of brain cancer during the holidays”. 
Friday 21 June 2013 0 comments


This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honour of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honour of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honour of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favour cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

Monday 17 June 2013 0 comments


I'm actually writing this from the wealth of experience i've gotten from being turned down by ladies, yeah i mean it, being turned down by ladies. A good number of us might have experienced a situation whereby you probably like a girl, you start the process of chiking her and the rest. You guys get a little close to an extent that you can share some personal stuff.

It gets to a point where she either starts using these words or you are the one who even starts it. words like; Hi Hun, Hi Hunnay, Hi Dearie, Hi Boo, Hi Bae etc you might feel very loved and special but I tell you most solemnly, thou shall not fall for these nonsense. Why??????? you might ask, permit to use two points only to treat this issue.


Oh Yes!!!! these words are fancy terms. Now judge these two statements, which one carries more       weight 
                  Hi Hun, I love You
                  Hi Victor, I Love You

I am 95.235% very sure of this. The users of these Hyper Emotional Heightening words most times don't mean whatever they are saying. Let me put it in more appropriate terms; They want you padlocked in the FRIENZONE. They want you around but they don't want you seriously around, so the only way to maintain this equilibrium is to play with your emotions.

I wrote this because of the experience i've had in my short life so far. I admonish you to flee the users of these words.

Sunday 16 June 2013 0 comments

The Silent Honor- To My Father

This world has seen many fathers
Who have performed many great and noble things.
Strengthened a nation,
Silenced fears,
Relieved suffering
And changed the course of history.

Yet the most great and noble father I have known
Lives within the walls of my own home.
He performs no extraordinary tasks,
No miraculous feats;
He just does what is right because
It is right.

He needs no adulation,
No praise or glory of men.
He just goes about doing good because
That is how it makes him feel.

But there are those that see his goodness.
They are his children.
Indeed, they may not always see
But they know
That this silent honor is what they will pass on
To their children.

They know that true greatness needs no praise
It is found in the day-to-day living of unwearied goodness
They have seen their father give.
Such goodness is truly a remarkable thing,
Far greater than any glory found in the annals of history.
For one day the child will say:
'He is my father'And know it is an honor.

 - Joseph D Jensen

Dedicated to  the most awesome of fathers, MINE!!!   
Saturday 15 June 2013 0 comments

Dear Diana. (EPISODE 3)

You guessed right! Diana and I never spoke again after that day. I didn’t even have the guts to walk up to her again for the fear of what my friends could do. The funny thing was that, every time she saw me, she simply smiled and turned her face away. This went on for a whole semester.
During the week before exams, a lecturer posed a question at me and asked me to stand up then tell the entire class what I thought the answer was. Unfortunately, I didn’t know it so I simply stared like a dumb-ass. Jeez! I felt so embarrassed. After a few minutes of insulting me for not listening in class, he then voiced out loudly “Who is willing to bail him out by answering the question?”
His words were followed by a young lady who raised her right hand above her head. She stood up and answered the question so well. In fact, I felt more foolish. I rubbed my eyes to get a clear picture of who it was and to my greatest shock, it was Diana.

By the time she was done speaking, the class gave her a round of applause. Deep within, I began to wonder why anybody would hold anything against her. I finally decided that I was going to try and make-up for what happened the last time. So after lectures, I rushed to get her a cone of ice-cream. All the while, I didn’t know that Emeka had been studying my movements. As I approached Diana to say thank-you, Emeka purposely ran into me and spilled the ice-cream on Diana muttering “Good job Bryan, Ice-cream is meant to mess up messed up girls”.

With those words, he sauntered off. He had succeeded in making it look like I purposely bought the ice-cream to pour it on Diana. Before I could get a grip of myself and apologize, in tears, Diana walked out on me.


Thursday 13 June 2013 0 comments



Who has defined the word "love" for you? There is a lot being said about love these days and you have to be careful who you listen to or you might get the wrong idea about the meaning of love. While musicians and poets attempt to describe and define love in its many splendorous forms, no writer deals with the matter of love as musically and poetically as the Apostle Paul. Nowhere else in all of literature, either sacred or secular, will you find the meaning of love more beautifully expressed than in 1 Corinthians 13. The 13th Chapter of 1 Corinthians is like a prism. When a beam of light is passed through a prism, it comes out on the opposite side broken up into its component, yellow, violet, orange, and all the colors of the rainbow. So it is with love as it passes through the inspired heart of the Apostle Paul. We see it broken up into its component elements in 1 Corinthians 13.
... And now these three remain: Faith, Hope and Love.
 But the GREATEST of these is LOVE(1 Corinthians 13:13)

Wednesday 12 June 2013 0 comments


Examination is not the ultimate.....


For all my esteemed readers who know not much about this great man, He lived in a time when justice had different meanings. He was one who kept his head, when others were losing theirs. On this day, 20 years ago, he won Nigeria’s yet freest and fairest election. Sadly, he wasn't allowed to live long enough to fulfill his promises.
Nigerians put behind them the myth about ethnic and religious divide. One of the two parties that Babangida created the Social Democratic Party – (the other being the National Republican Convention – NRC) had two Muslim candidates, Moshood Abiola (from Ogun State in the South-West) and his running mate, Babagana Kingibe (from Borno State in the North-East). It didn’t matter. Abiola defeated Bashir Tofa, the presidential candidate of the NRC, (a Muslim from Kano in the North-West) in his home constituency.
That was how sophisticated the electorate was 20 years ago. June 12, 1993 mattered because for the first time in the post-independence electoral history of Nigeria, there was no focus on religion or ethnicity. For the first and only time Nigerians were going to have a president they actually voted for. There were hardly any reports of electoral violence. Even the elements (no rainfall throughout the election in the rainy month of June) conspired to deny IBB a reason to stop the election.
June 12 this year marks the 20th anniversary of Babangida’s failed diabolical political experiment. The country has come full circle. Today, the remnants of that perfidious era still call the shots in our so-called democratic order.

My question is what really happened to M.K.O?
Even the best analysts and the most honest journalists this country possess haven’t given us a candid answer. The worst part is not lying to over 160 million Nigerians who withstood the elements to put those in power, in power, it is showing we Nigerians that we aren’t worth the truth! We, the future of this great country DESERVE AND WANT the truth!!! The powers that be must appreciate the fact that they cannot sweep things under the carpet forever and that one day, no matter how long it takes, they will be held accountable by God and the Nigerian people for the morbid, secret and oftentimes homicidal choices and decisions that they made.

Rest in Peace, Chief Moshood Kashimawo Olawale Abiola (24th August 1937-8th July 1998)

Tuesday 11 June 2013 0 comments

Humor: Things Nigerians are Fond of (Final Part)

If you are just joining us on this series for the first time, you can get the previous parts here; PART 1, PART 2, PART 3. Now for the concluding part;

*        The cost of living in Abuja is more expensive than the cost of living in London.
*        Nigeria has the highest number of musicians in the world.
*        There's a place called Sabo in every state in Nigeria.
*        Nigerians are the highest users of slangs in Africa, 2nd only to USA in the world.
*        The most spoken phrase in Nigeria is "How far?
*        Nigeria is the only country where everybody looks forward to hearing the First Lady speak.
*        An Ibo man hustles from Jan 2 to Dec 24, only to spend it all in the village during Christmas and New Year.
*        Pot belly in Nigeria is not regarded as obesity but as being rich.
*        Nigerian homes always have a cane very close.
*        The first thing Nigerians will learn in another language is insult.
*        Every Nigerian parent came 1st in their class when they were in school.
*        Nigerians love to invite people to the occasion they were invited to.
*        Nigerians borrow from you and wait until you ask them for it before they return it.
*        Nigerians will tell you they are coming while they are going.
*    Till today, some Nigerians do not know if it it 'stuck', 'stalk' or 'stock' fish.

Hope you enjoyed it. This was not intended to insult anyone directly or indirectly. Feel free to add your opinion. Nigeria, Good People, Great Nation!!!
Monday 10 June 2013 0 comments

Photography: The #bylexash Project

Lexash Photography owned by Ashimole Chidi, is one of the finest photography brands i've seen in this part of the world. He is going to be a graduate in a couple of weeks time and he wants anyone who has a photograph taken by him to upload it with the hash tag #bylexash whether on instagram, Facebook or Twitter. So that when anyone searches the internet or twitter or any social network for that matter, they see what may be able to keep him and the "photographed" in touch, an indelible memory of times they shared, with only a camera between them. He is also personalizing the photographs he'll be uploading, by adding the names of the photographed. You can find a some here. The most annoying thing is that my own picture is not here :(

Saturday 8 June 2013 0 comments

Dear Diana. (EPISODE 2)

Excitedly, I called the attention of my friends as I showed them the girl that had been on my mind since my inception into the University. They all had different expressions. Tosin whispered gently “Pretty girl but looks like a book-worm”.
Charles hissed then muttered “She’s not even that fine, there are other finer babes on Campus and I can prove that”. Emeka’s reaction was the most shocking “Don’t go near that babe, you’ll hate yourself for trying it”. Surprised, I directed my gaze at him and asked “Why? What’s wrong with her?”
With venom in his voice, Emeka continued “We dated in secondary school”
I was shocked. Seeing the look on my face, Emeka continued “She sucked me dry and dumped me for a richer guy”. My ears were filled. For a moment, I wished that I didn’t show them who Diana was. In fact, till today I wished I had kept her person secret. It was almost impossible to further any plans with her based on what I had just heard. After what Emeka had said, the other guys began to insult her and call her names. I was simply numb.

That day, after classes I decided to sit down in class and ponder on the whole issue after my friends had left. Dating Diana would mean letting go of what Emeka said and forging ahead but what if he was speaking the truth. I could feel confusion driving through my veins.
The next day, I sat in class with puzzled look on my face. From afar, I sighted Diana in a corner of the class. She was absorbed in the book that she was reading. Perplexed on what to do, I decided to walk up to her. “Hi” I mouthed gently as I sat beside her.
With a smile, she responded “Hello”. A conversation began. It wasn’t long before my friends came into the class and noticed what was happening. On seeing them, I began to act like I didn’t know Diana was sitting beside me. Just then, they came over. Emeka was the first to speak as he voiced loudly “Stupid” with a hiss to follow. Although he didn’t mention anybody’s name, it was quite obvious that he was referring to Diana. My other friends were laughing hysterically in support of what Emeka said.
I stared in shock, not knowing what to do. As if trying to help me, Emeka continued “Abeg, Bryan.....make we dey go”

Without complaining or saying a word to Diana, I stood up and left with them.
Thursday 6 June 2013 0 comments


Ever had something you always wanted to tell someone but you never had the opportunity to?
Ever had something you always wanted to do, but never did it?
If you were to die in three days’ time, what would you say or do?
The better question is why haven’t you said it or why haven’t you done it?

Life is too short, count your days in moments and not in years, always smile, let go of people who truly do not matter and appreciate the people who matter, never cry over issues that won’t matter in the next 2, 3, 5 years, laugh like it’s your last, dance like it’s your best. Love like it’s your first and forgive and forget. Hold no grudge, talk no slander. Remain happy, free, pure and chaste!

Life’s too short, don’t shorten it the more, avoid recklessness, do that which is right. If you like something, state it, if you love someone, say it. If you need something, ask for it. If you are asked, give it. Ignore all destructive criticism and just remain who you are.

Life’s too short, so…
-Pay for a stranger on your way home.
-Tell the lady you buy stuff from that she is doing a great job.
-Give a stranger a reason to smile.
-Talk to the guy who never talks in class.
-Lend someone a hand without being asked.
-Help a random course mate with his/her failing grade.
-Tell that boy/girl he/she is handsome/beautiful.
-Ask that girl out
-Befriend the loner of your class
-Tell someone your life story without leaving any detail out
-Sleep under the stars
-Tell your siblings you love them soooo much
-Make a big ‘thank you’ card for your parents
-Call a forgotten friend and arrange for a rendezvous
-Stare at the mirror and shout ‘I LOVE YOU SO MUCH’

Wednesday 5 June 2013 0 comments



Things Nigerians Are Fond Of (Part 3)

9.       Nollywood; 
The Nigerian movie industry, also known as Nollywood, is the 2nd largest film industry in the world. They have produced unforgettable classics such as ‘Osuofia in London’ (1 and 2), One Dollar, and The Master, to name a few. Though this is a $250 million industry that is rapidly expanding and renowned, the quality of these movies, for the most part, has remained the same. Despite the VCD format (not DVD, but VCD, which is basically a CD with video files on it), over-exaggerative acting, and predictable plots, we can’t get enough of “Naija home videos”. If you’ve never watched one before, the following will show you what you should expect.

 You go to your local African Food Mart, (or if you’re in Nigeria, any market, salon, street corner, cyber cafe, etc.) to purchase home videos. How do you decide which one to get? Do you rely on the synopsis of the movie on the back cover? Yeah right! The title might help you, but all that you will find on the cover of a Nigerian movie are pictures of the major characters with their best (or worst) expressions from the movie. Anyway, you buy the VCD—but wait!! Make sure you inquire about parts 2 and 3. Nigerian movies CANNOT fit in 2 VCDs. Mind you; these are not sequels to Part 1. They are the same movie, just broken up into 6 VCDs. If you don’t ask for the other parts, you will be highly pissed when the movie ends in mid-sentence and a screen pops up saying “TO GOD BE THE GLORY”! Right when you pop in the VCD, you might just want to turn your volume way down for the first, say 15 minutes, of the video. Why? Previews. For some reason, the previews to other movies are the LOUDEST part of the VCD. Be prepared to hear the fastest-talking Nigerian in the world screaming over annoying 80s computer-generated sounds, fake guns and bombs blasting, car crashes, and other random scenes from the movies. Nigerian movies may not work on your DVD player. If you don't own a VCD player, try to play it on your laptop. When the previews are over, make sure you turn your volume up, no, WAY UP, because you won’t be able to hear any of the conversations in the movie if you don’t. Be prepared to adjust your volume accordingly THROUGHOUT the movie, too. If you get lost during the movie, don’t worry. All the lyrics to the background music explain what is going on: “She is in love with 2 men; Obinna and Mahmoud. She’s Torn Between Two Loves (this happens to be the title of the movie too); she doesn’t know what to do. If there is a main character, 9 times out of 10, he is always talking about shipping containers or going overseas for business. However, by the end of the movie, you still don’t know exactly what he did or what he was even shipping. If there is a hospital scene, you will only see one nurse, one doctor, and the person in a regular bed (no hospital bed with rails) and one IV (drip). The person could have been in a serious car wreck or shot up 50 times and will still manage to survive on that one drip! Nigerian movie makers fail to maintain a sense of consistency when it comes to the hair and make-up department.  As the movie begins, the main character “Ife” will have long, black, silky hair.  The next morning, however, Ife will have a full head of micro-braids.  Later that evening, her braids have magically disappeared and Ife is now sporting a short, maroon bob.
Tuesday 4 June 2013 0 comments

Humor: Things Nigerians Are Fond of. (Part Two)

4.   Other People’s Business; Most Nigerian women spend at least 50% of their free time on the phone gossiping (no offence) and what do they really talk about? Other people. Who fits into this category of “other people”? No one is off limits as the subject of conversation – relatives, family friends, colleagues, neighbours, other people’s babies – basically anyone who has ever interacted with this Nigerian person is fair game. There’s never a dull moment when talking to a Nigerian because there’s always something to talk about. Yes, even topics that do not and will not ever concern you are debated for hours and hours.

5.       If it’s not Loud, It’s Not Nigerian!; if you visit a Nigerian church for the first time, you may mistake the Praise & Worship for an early morning yell session. It seems like Nigerians love singing these songs at the top of their lungs, heart, rib cage, throat, etc…. Please don’t let this frighten you, Nigerians love projecting their voices. If it’s not loud, it’s not Nigerian!!!!
Has it ever occurred to you that our parents, uncles, and aunts love to make sure their voices are higher than anyone else’s within a half mile radius? Well, this may become a problem when this turns into a competition. Nigerian’s know that whoever has the loudest argument must have the best argument, therefore; they win. Whether it’s speaking to your elementary school teacher, talking on the phone to a best friend, or singing praise songs in church…Nigerians take pride in having the loudest voice
Keep in mind; the same people that love screaming are also the same ones that coined the phrase “Don’t shout on me!”

6.  Pointing With their Lips; People tend to point at things with their fingers, I mean, it only makes sense. However, Nigerians have created their own way of pointing. It is well known that many Nigerians have been blessed with full, plump lips. However, who would have thought that these pepper soup coolers could be used to POINT??? If you are Nigerian, you have probably witnessed your parents, aunties, uncles, etc. use their lips to point to something. That “something”, which they may refer to as “dis tin‘” is probably within their arms reach, but that’s another story. A Nigerian father who wants a pen on the desk may turn his head towards the desk, say “get me dat tin,” and poke out his lips towards the pen. You think it would be simple enough to just say “get me the pen,” but Nigerians are efficient people. Why waste energy using your voice or silly fingers, when God has blessed our people with ample lips to do the job!
Monday 3 June 2013 0 comments

Humor: Things Nigerians Are Fond of. (Part One)

I never for once question myself as to why I am a Nigerian. The beauty of we Nigerians is the way we are always ‘suffering and smiling’. No matter how things get, there is always a reason to smile. That’s for another day. Well, after intensive survey, questioning, observations and brouhaha, I have come up with this list of interesting attributes and facts (and a tint of fiction) this great country and her citizens possess.

1.       Football Fever; Nothing brings this great country together like the game of football. In fact, in 1967, the two factions involved in the Nigerian Civil War agreed to a forty-eight hour ceasefire so that they could watch Pelé play an exhibition game in Lagos. Yes, you read it correctly…Nigerians paused the Biafran war in order to watch a soccer match and afterward resumed the war. Can you imagine? If you still do not understand how seriously we take this sport, do research on the reaction of our president. The disgusted President Goodluck Jonathan threatened to suspend the national team after the most recent Olympics. What more can I use to prove my point other than the ‘gifts’ the Super Eagles received upon winning the recent African Cup of Nations.

2.       Rhetorical or not?; Nigerians, over the years, have demonstrated an inability to identify when a question is rhetorical. Sometimes they identify one but in the true Nigerian nature of wanting to have a say in any and every matter, they answer the question.
Let’s take this scenario as an example;
Girl: "Are you a good football player?"
Guy: "HMM. Is Kola Nut bitter?
           Is Suya Very Sweet??
          Does Goat Meat Require Chewing stick????"
Girl: "yes, of course."
Guy: *blank stare*
I’m sure most are confused right now, don’t worry, you are proudly Nigerian. The Nigerian rhetoric is a thing of great annoyance yet very funny and beautiful in a way only a Nigerian can acknowledge.

3.       African Time; In pretty much any culture, accomplishments like birthdays, graduations, and weddings are cause for celebration. These celebrations involve people, music, food and gifts but there are certain signs that will let you know that you’ve just walked into a Nigerian function.
Now let’s assume that this celebration starts at 5:00 P.M., if you are a Nigerian, then you know 8:30 P.M. is around the time showers are being taken. Now it’s about 9 o’clock and the MC is arriving right on schedule. You never know how he will look when he arrives. Some have on traditional wear, but if this is a graduation party, he most likely wants to relate to the younger audience so he has on his basketball hat that was purchased from Wal-Mart 10 minutes prior, a black t-shirt with FUBU across the middle, khaki shorts, and of course cotton black socks to match the shirt and ‘pams’. The MC talks in the microphone throughout the function about what’s happening next while attempting to keep everyone entertained. Now that he’s arrived he picks up the party program so that he can study and prepare what he is going to say. The MC knows that he needs to say UHHHHHHH at least 72 times and other fillers that he can repeat over and over again like ‘this is a joyous occasion’
Maybe you are not familiar with Nigerian society and got to the function at the time stated on the flyer. For that I apologize, because I know as soon as you walked in you were confused and probably thought you were in the wrong building because no one was there yet. Well at least no Nigerians have, there may be some white and Asian families looking wide eyed/lost/confused as well. Just be patient, you are in the right place and you’ll start to have fun in a few hours (but not before you’re forced to help set-up the tables and chairs).


A Year after,…With All the Love in Our Hearts.

With heavy hearts, we honour the souls of those who lost their lives this day, a year ago.

The loss of friends and loved ones is never easy to bear. It is one of the most difficult things to experience especially because there’s a deep void that can never be filled. They say time heals all wounds, but there are some wounds that even the passing of time can not really heal. At best, what we feel is a numbing of the hurt as we struggle to move on without that person who meant so much to us. With every milestone of the passing, something nudges that sore spot and it comes again, that indescribable pain that we felt when we first realized that that person was no longer in this realm.

On Sunday, June 3, 2012, a Dana Air 9J-922 plane from Abuja crashed in Iju Ishaga on the outskirts of Lagos. The crash resulted in the loss of over a hundred and fifty lives. These lives lost were not just part of statistical data, they were our family members, our friends, and people we loved so dearly. As the anguish rose in our hearts and the pain threatened to tear us we thought of the unfairness of it all. Why us? Why now? Why this?

With every day that passed, we struggled to live each day seeking strength and solace from divinity because it seemed like there was a storm threatening to break loose within us. So with every dusk, we looked forward to a new dawn, for it seemed like the only way to get through.

Three hundred and Sixty-Five days after, the questions still confound us but we trudge on, in faith and love and the blessed memories our beautiful loved ones left behind.

So as we remember the victims of the Dana Air plane crash one year ago, we are grateful for the time we were given to spend with them. We are hopeful for a better tomorrow. We derive strength from within to live on and we know that the light of the lives of the dearly departed shines on brightly.

The Federal Government has instituted an annual aviation safety programme in memory of the victims of the June 3, 2012 Dana Air crash, Vanguard reports.

To mark the one year remembrance of the crash, the Federal Government plans to unveil a cenotaph in their memory  today.
Rest in peace...dear ones.



Saturday 1 June 2013 0 comments

Dear Diana. Episode 1

I can never forget the first day I stepped into Triumphant University, it was my most memorable day ever and here’s why. As soon as I alighted from the bus, I bumped into the most beautiful girl ever. It wasn't the fact that she almost caused me to land on the floor but there was something about her that radiated and caught my attention. It was the first time I saw Diana Okwudili.
Diana was tall, fair and very beautiful. It was like she wasn't of this world. I stared for a while before the person behind jerked me into reality muttering “My friend move out of the way”. In the twinkle of an eye, Diana was gone. I had to find her soon. Those were the last words I thought about before I sauntered off to begin the clearance process.

Soon afterwards, lectures began and deep within me, I hoped that Diana was going to resurface on campus. My newly acquired friends kept telling me to forget about ever seeing her again. According to them, there were several fishes in the water and Diana was one of those fishes. It was funny but that was exactly how they put it.
“Besides, Triumphant University is a really big school and the probability that you’ll this dream girl is very low” Tosin- one of my pals voiced out gently. On hearing his statement, it dawned on me that there could be the possibility of truth in what he was saying. Initially, it felt saddening but after a while I began to accept the reality.

My class was very large and it was quite obvious that I probably wasn’t going to speak to some people even for the time period that we were going to remain in the university. It was like I saw new faces every single day. On the last day of the month, we were having our final lecture for the day when the lecturer posed a very difficult question. In no time, a young lady stood up confidently to answer the question.
After she brilliantly answered the question, with a smile; the lecturer asked “What’s your name?”
“Diana Okwudili” she responded calmly.
My mouth dropped in shock as I raised my head a little bit.
Diana Okwudili was my course-mate.